Life Is Hard

They say being a mother is the hardest job in the world. Being a mother I can attest that it is hard, but I would still disagree with the sentiment. Rather, it's just another layer of hard while you are just doing life.

Being a mother, father, friend, co-worker or whatever else you add to that life - they can make it easier at times or harder than it already is - it just depends. Life itself will smack you upside the head with so many different situations making IT, living through it and surviving it, the hardest thing to do. Add to that all the different things we contribute to it rather poorly making our predicaments even worse.

www.facebook.com/TheIDEAlistRevolution

Yeah... congratulations. You deserve that.

Satan REALLY Has A Hold On Me

Satan/Lucifer/Beelzebub/Anti-Christ... all monikers for the evil one. The one who opposes all that is good about God. The opposite of love, the opposite of kindness; always creating chaos and destruction in all that he touches or involves himself with. According to many who believe in Christ, Satan is the one who contributes to all what's wrong with this world. I'm going to assume that's why God never gets the credit when bad shit happens, not when a child is raped or when natural catastrophes leave people homeless or worse, dead. Satan did it, the innocents are only in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or who knows, maybe it was a lesson they had to learn and WERE in the right place at the right time; God's plan is mysterious, after all.

The big meanie is mentioned in Chronicles, 1 Timothy, Revelation, Zechariah, Acts, Romans, 1 & 2 Corinthians, John, Mathew, Luke, Mark and mostly in Job. Guess that means he's real. Yeah, real like every thing in the bible claims to be. It's the word of God, so indisputably real. *Insert sarcasm here, just in case you didn't pick up what I was putting down.

I've never been personally told to my face that I must be Satan-like or a Satanic worshiper because I do not believe in God, but I've had many friends who have shared experiences with me where people (you know, the good Christians) have taunted them with slurs like that. It always amazes me that it would occur because if you think about it (and I know they have a hard time with that), if one doesn't believe in a god, why would that same someone believe or worship another imaginary entity, one just as incredulous as the first one they rebuke for lack of evidence? Do facts about Satan's existence exist where none for God do? Silly Christian, get your thinking cap on and make that light bulb go off... PLEASE!

A friend of mine who is teetering on the fence of what he believes was in shock when he found out that I identified as an Atheist. His exact words were "But you are so nice!" Well, of course I'm nice. Just because I don't believe in a god for whom there is no evidence doesn't automatically make me evil! But because I don't...

• Take Jesus to be my Lord and Savior (because I don't think he's real)
• Adhere to all of the Ten Commandments (some are just silly)

and because I do...

• Speak out against the irrational, the illogical, and some downright non-sensical things

... I'm considered not only wrong in my thinking, but yes, also an evil person by some. Oh, I hate when that happens! Not really. Actually, I find it comical. When I think of evil, I think of someone who has no conscience, driven only by a desire to fulfill any and every hateful desire. That person only wanting an outcome that produces a detrimental effect for someone else. There is no contemplation of right or wrong, only an internal need that wants acting on and a total and utter lack of empathy for the outcome; however disastrous it is for the person it is being inflicted upon. THAT is not me! Don't get me wrong, I've had hateful desires and have wished some very unsavory things would happen to some people, but I have never acted on them. This means I'm human, but a thoughtful one and certainly not evil.

Let's look at the guidelines that good people follow. We'll see how I rate.

 The Ten Commandments (Exodus 20:2-17 NKJV)

1.  "I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. You shall have no other gods before Me."

I don't... before or after. Good there, so far.

2.  "You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth; you shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me, but showing mercy to thousands, to those who love Me and keep My Commandments."

One commandment, so many directives! Okay, haven't made a carved image or likeness... cause I'm just not that artistic. I don't bow down or worship anything or anyone. If I don't have any proof for existence, how can I love it? Damn, one for two.

3. "You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain."

Oh, I'm obviously fucked here.

4.  "Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God. In it you shall do no work: you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your male servant, nor your female servant, nor your cattle, nor your stranger who is within your gates. For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it."

Whew! Safe there... I always make sure to have at least one day of downtime. 

(This is really a fucking commandment?)

5.   "Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you."

I think he should have made sure that he gave me parents worth

 honoring. This one is not my fault.

6.   “You shall not murder."

I'm cool there.

7.  "You shall not commit adultery."

Guilty.

8.  "You shall not steal."

Guilty here, too. However, in my defense, had I not stolen as a child and then been disciplined in a very unique way, I would never have learned my lesson never to do it again. The commandment didn't stop me, my own actions did.

9.  "You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor."

I've lied, but I've really made it my goal in my life to be direct and honest at all times. I find that I'm more honest than most people, especially those who are supposedly cut of better cloth than me.

10.  "You shall not covet your neighbor's house; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's."

Good, I don't covet!!

Well, that's only four out of ten commandments that I can say I'm down with, but since I also dis the Jesus fella by not accepting him as my Lord and Savior... yep, still evil in some people's eyes.

So, if I'm only evil because I'm admitting to the world that I don't follow your guidelines tooth and nail or worship your god because I don't have enough evidence to accept there really is a god, then I'm to believe that all those who DO give it up to the god, supposedly following in the steps of their lord by being good... those are the ones who aren't evil? Really? Then please explain what I found here. Seems to me there are some pretty evil people claiming to be good or in other words, good people being evil and doing evil things. In my defense, seems I'm being judged for the wrong reasons.

Frankly, in my opinion, I shouldn't be judged at all. It's nobody's business how I choose to live, but specifically because I'm not causing detriment to anyone by how I choose to live my life. Just because someone is peeved that I have the audacity to function in my life differently than the way they live theirs... just fuck you and fuck off. Go do something productive. Harassing me, judging me, not accepting me for who I am will...

     a) not make me change my mind nor

     b) will I even remotely begin to consider that your way of life adds any value to mine.

Satan is obviously strong with this one. So defiant. he he

civ·i·lized... Living It

I've understood it to mean people are polite, well-bred, refined or that we are striving to have an advanced or humane culture or society. Being civilized is a great concept. There are some that I'd assign that label, but then I'd have to look around our world and see we are far from it... really.

 

Every day there are indecent and inhumane acts perpetrated on fellow human beings and the most heinous are those against our innocent ones. Daily I'm reminded how cruel some in our societies can be towards others; the victims though strong, they are defeated and the weak who can't fight back, they easily succumb. You've seen the unspeakable on Facebook, on the news or through a retelling of a story by a friend. It's all horrendous and it's not civilized.

When the news feed is especially full and laden with these horror stories I easily become depressed and feel heaviness in my physical state. To be empathetic is to risk having these emotions and feelings, and it literally hurts when these awful situations present themselves. You wish you had the power to change the bad outcomes for all those stories that you come in contact with, but you know you can't. That only makes it hurt worse some times. But what can you do? Sometimes nothing. Other times you can make a donation, send supplies, offer calming words and a shoulder or a bear hug to wipe away the sorrow. Being helpful when you are empathetic goes a long way to healing your heart-felt emotions that flood up your being and it benefits someone else to help lift them out of their misery. But sometimes I don't feel like I ever do near enough because the bad just keeps coming.

How civilized can we really be when it just doesn't ever seem to end? I don't think we are really completely civilized if we look at the big picture of humanity on this planet. We seem to be getting a step or two above being the totally barbaric humans we were thousands of years ago when intelligence seemed to be lacking, but we still have some segments of the population who missed the lessons of the enlightenment period.

 

I've witnessed some individual people who are civilized, at least they appear to be. But maybe they are just like me. I used to think I was until I truly contemplated what being civilized meant to me. Remembering instances when I didn't lift a finger, for whatever the reason, challenged that thought. Watching ex-friends implode from sidelines, just shaking my head saying they deserved it. Karma bitch... you're getting what you had coming to you. I didn't feel any hesitation in not doing anything, nor a pang of guilt. My empathy chip is on low or does it really mean I'm full of shit when I say I'm civilized?

There are many people who have wronged me that I've put on my list that I won't or don't lift a finger for. This honest admission causes me to think that I might be less civilized than I thought I was. My inaction or my less than helpful mood shows me to be vengeful. Although I know that if those people on my list were bleeding in front of me I couldn't look away. Much less do nothing to end their sorrow, pain or predicament. My good nature would surface once again; being proactively humane would suggest that I am indeed civilized. It's just that I don't have as much empathy for their plight at the time they hurt me; being human means I'll be human when the time comes.

Writing gets me thinking and thereby doing or at the very least, trying to do the right thing. It has made me more civilized, I think. I know that it is impossible for me to stop every bad thing that happens in the world, but just being a live human being means I have to make a commitment to myself to strive to be better and do better everyday. That is what makes me civilized! I defiantly impact my world in a positive fashion, my actions reflect my humanity showing that I've thoughtfully chosen to teach my family and community what it means to live civilized among them. How my world around me is starts with me from the time I wake up and doesn't end until I go to bed after giving my day everything that I can. If I can't bring something positive to it then I'm adding nothing of value to it and being a part of a civilization is a lie. I don't want to be UN-civilized. 

I need to be sure that my daily efforts are guided by that thought and my input reflects it.